All play and no work makes any Krack a sick boy...

So, no excuses..an hour of running...same old place..Same old company...Maya..a different song on repeat ;-)
half an hour of staring into the wildnerness..alone on a lonelier rock...Even I wud look like a philosopher!
And Krack can go and play everyday...but Jack took a break from playing today...He got some work done...no matter how shoddily...he got some work done!
Not bad for a Monday! ;-) Nostalgic charms (of working hard on a Monday)....they just don't seem to leave me..
Haunted! Life is almost haunted by nostalgia!

Super Sunday - "Happy Days" (Telugu; no review)

This Sunday should have been exhausting really...But it wasnt exhausting one bit! Dont get me wrong.,It wasnt a lazy Sunday...A sunday when you leave home at 9 am and return at 10 30 pm is anything but lazy!
Come to think of it...this was the first time we were all having Buffet breakfast at this restaurant..We ve been living here all these years and never been to this restaurant for the buffet breakfast although we were only 3 kms away! I guess Better late than never ...And better here for breakfast than wherever!
You have all the SOuth Indian delicacies for breakfast..Idli, vada, Pongal, Khaara baath, Kesari baath, Shavige(noodles), Masala and other dosas, Rotti, fruits, juice...and all of this for only Rs. 60...Man! Why dont we have more Sundays in a week? ;-) Or why does Kamath Bugle Rock have buffet breakfast only on SUndays???
Later this morning...I meet this kid..He is a kid alrite! Anyone who is 8 years younger is..if he isnt a kid, you're probably a kid yourself! ;-)
So..the only thing I have in common with this kid is my name ;-)
Sharp...sharp is an understatement...I know I wud be making a note of his email Id in the very first minute of talking to him...After all..this next generation..I need to know how they think...and man! they think..I first need to know how to think...and then try and know how they think what they think ;-)

So...with more driving around town with a younger cousin around..he is also a kid alrite! With more driving around town and checking out houses and people, I thought I would be closing the day with this movie in the evening..
Happy Days..a Telugu movie..neat, sweet college story...More than anything else, a clean Telugu family movie!
Definitely a must watch if you know Telugu...After all you dont get to, often...
We all return, and just when I was about to retire, I get a call from 2 others who missed out on the dinner last evening..These guys actually kinda knew me more/better/worse (take your pick!)
So, we chat away for 1.5 hours or so...A CCD after 4.5 months! They ve even changed the menu...They no longer have the Ethiopian Qahwah or the Columbian Quest...I settle for an "Aztec"...Thank god, with some friends you can philosophise even over coffee...I mean...all sober and still philosophise!
One of us comes across as less emotional...Not too many other apparent/noticeable changes...I am not sure if I should thank God..One has to thank someone only when one knows whom to thank and why, if at all!
So...."come across"...and "noticeable changes"..Remember! Lifes not too unkind...the truth...the plain and simple truth..never really simple..and almost never plain! But then, dont we all change...every moment? Howsoever little? ;-) :-D

High school friends giving up an evening's high!

5 of us... high school friends met up this evening...And almost as if it were magical, we changed our plans..We changed our mind and instead of the going to our regular hang out, we went out to only a restaurant...A Saturday evening for most IT professionals is an opportunity to "feel good"...
And high school friends went without a high...For me? Undeservingly if at all? Hmm...not sure...not sure either way...if it was for me...or for me and undeservingly so...
But there is one thing I have never forgotten..That it should have always been easy for these guys to not count me in...I was not really one of them...I studied in this school for only two years...They all grew up together...But never once did I feel like an outsider...They ve always made me feel like I was one amongst them...And its definitely not to do with me....Not completely atleast! May be I shouldnt over analyse some things...Things like friendship...what friends can do for you...its as puzzling as much as it is comforting...and sometimes you always wonder if you have actually really interacted or met these guys everyday for only two years...But then there is something about school friends...They always remind you of your past...They know what you really are :-)
So...Thames in Jayanagar 39th cross it was...for dinner...A looooong time since I had spent 250 bucks for dinner :-D
A funny feeling really..pinches your pocket coz ur no longer earning...But then you used to do it every weekend if not more often...So, it has some nostalgic value as well..
Luckily for me...I ve been undeservingly lucky this evening...Lucky pig!
We find a gelato place...and all of us have gelato...What a Saturday evening!...Man! I should go away and come back more often ;-)

Movie review : Dus Kahaaniyaa.

Rating: Lies somewhere between Watchable and Good
(Scale = Avoidable/Watchable/Good/Very Good/Must Watch)

This is not your regular Bollywood flick.
Watching a movie on the day of the release, without waiting to hear or read reviews is an experiment no less.
And when the movie is in itself an experiment (10 stories and 6 directors), expectations did not bias my movie watching experience.

I don't want to compare the movie with Darna Manaa Hain or more recently, Life in a Metro...The former had 6 horror stories, some of them rather comical...and the latter was more like a compressed K serial telecast on Star Plus (I particularly associate this teleserial "Swaabhimaan" with this latter one).

Why I really don't want to compare Dus Kahaaniya with the previous two, is that, in my opinion, Dus Kahaaniya is really going to be enjoyable for those amongst us who have a short attention span. For those amongst who have little or no patience for the song and dance routines of the typical Bollywood flick, Dus Kahaaniya seems to cater to our tastes - a movie should be more about the plots or stories or even acting, rather than revolving around mistaken and nonsensical notions of romance etc.,

Barring 2-3 stories, Dus Kahaaniya is really worth watching, of course with the consideration that this is a movie experiment...
The stories are good..not really gripping or thrilling, but they do manage to hold your attention for the entire length..howsoever short..

The movie has probably failed to fully capitalise on great actors like Nana Patekar, Naseeruddin Shah, Shabana Azmi, Sanjay Datt, Manoj Bajpai, and 6 directors!
But having said that, some consideration should also be given to the fact that each story plays out for about 10 minutes on an average, and it is really difficult for both the directors and actors to pack in really powerful performances, irrespective of their potential.

Given that my last watched movie was "Dhan dhana dhan goal" , I might be tempted to rate this as "Very Good"...but then, in a conscious and conscientious effort towards being objective about an opinion, I guess I will have to rate this movie as being between "Watchable" and "Good"...and if allowed to take sides, suggest that the movie is much more than just "Watchable" and closer to "Good"..

And given that I was watching the movie at a single screen 5 minutes away from home;and that 3 tickets cost as much one normally pays for a single ticket at a multiplex, I am certainly not doing a "cost-benefit" analysis...After all..what are holidays for! :-)

P.S: I have consciously avoided giving any of the plots or details away in this review. So, please don't review my movie review saying that I really haven't told you much about the movie!

Bisi Bele Bath @Ballal, the company of books and a bibliophile...

Ballal Residency off Residency Road serves good Bisi Bele Baath, which in my opinion is a must have for Bangaloreans and visitors alike...Bonda Rasam and Masala Dosas are also good there....but Bisi Bele Baath being a Bangalore speciality, one just cannot afford to miss the opportunity of having it!
Crossword Bookstores, still has its charm for me, and this time around, I realised that it has more charm now than the building complex it is housed in ;-)
Books...for whatever little I have read them...( I have read more of books than books themselves I realised!) along with the company of a bibliophile can just make your day! Even if it were to be less than a third of the day!
The Jayanagar Ganapathi temple was a must visit, having remotely prayed, it was time for payback ;-)
And yeah...almost forgot this...Death by chocolate is still as good as it used to be at Corner House, and what more could ask for apart from ice creams and good company...books or bibliophiles..or better still...both!
Finally, I get to lay my hands on Maister's two books..Yet to find a good bargain on an old "Trusted advisor" copy...Hope to get lucky sometime...for now, there is enough and more to read!
In all, a good day! A very good day indeed :-)

Aloo Parathas, Bangalore's traffic, the uber rich; South Indian marriages

Breakfast = 5 Aloo Parathas (my personal best is 7, but today I could not afford to be drunk on food!)

Interview = 1 hour
(think about what happens before South Indian arranged and rearranged marriages...I wish I could write as well my Guruji Sidin Vadukut...but, I am still an amateur, and an immature one at that...So, I will give you a link to know what kind of an interview I am talking about...) I can tell you only this much..I was not the interview candidate! I was on the panel ;-)

Link??? Link!!!!
http://www.whatay.com/2007/09/17/marriages-are-made-in-thrissur/

So....if that was a good way to start the day, the rest of the day was no bad either!
Driving Mom and Dad around was in itself a voluntary undertaking...Yana and I have been away for too long...And long distance relationships need a lot of intense bonding for the periods when people meet...So...I just wanted to drive, drive and drive!
And driving mom and dad to the uber rich was more than satisfying for the senses...Materialism is something that is as worthy of appreciation as art of any other form ;-)

5 pm : Masala Dosa at Vidyarthi Bhavan...
Well...if you haven't heard about this place...here is what Wikipedia says under "Basavangudi"...
Vidyarthi Bhavan, a quaint little restaurant located in the heart of Gandhi bazaar makes the best Masala Dosa in the world. The aroma wafting through the air is a good enough indication that you are in the vicinity of this gastronomic heaven. This awesome restaurant is perennially jam-packed and still the most sought after hotel in the town.

I close the day with a wedding reception...Enough for a hectic day eh? You bet!

Movie review: Goal."Dhan dhana dhan goal".

Actually, I don't even want to review this movie!
I am doing it for exactly some of the 'reverse justification" rationale I use for blogging...

So...here goes:

Rating : Between "avoidable" and "go ahead, watch it you moron!" ;-)

I don't know why I watched the movie really....Little Sister only asked me if I would come along..with her friends to watch the movie...I wouldn't even have to bother about the tickets..
And given that it was a multiplex located close to ReallyNice, my old office (name disguised for obvious reasons!)...I agreed....I could negotiate to leave early and spend some time at the consulting office where I had worked for 22 months!

Why am I not talking about the movie?

Coz, I didn't like it one bit...I could have spent more time at the office, with people continuing to gape and look at me with awe, about how I have lost a lot of weight and some hair!
Man! I felt like a celebrity! I guess this was the closest to being a celebrity I will ever be ;-)

Movie review: Aa dinagalu (Kannada movie)

Thanks mom for watching this ahead of me and reviewing it for me, Dad and Little Sister.

Rating : Must watch (if you know Kannada)

This is not “just another” Kannada movie…I will leave this “just another” qualifier comfortably vague…I don’t even want to think about elaborating what most Kannada movies are like…So, let me just get on with reviewing this movie..

This movie, is set in the Bangalore of 1980s and centres around the dons of those years…For a movie centred around rowdyism, extortion and crime, it has been made very well…It doesn’t have “in your face” sort of violence that puts most of us educated, urban mortals off…And it is exactly this that why I liked the movie on the whole. Apart from this, it has been very carefully shot (The screenplay is by Girish Karnad, so no wonder! And just in case you haven’t heard of Girish Karnad earlier, he is a playwright and has won the Jnanpith, Padmashri and Padmabhushan awards) Any critic would not miss to appreciate certain things about the way the movie is shot….Set in the 1980’s, it must have really been painstakingly shot..Apart from resurrecting the Yezdis and Rajdoots for the movie, a lot of care must have been taken while shooting….You cant afford to show the Pulsars and Victors or the Honda Citys or other cars on Bangalore’s roads! They ve even taken the pains to resurrect old analog phones where the dialing had to be done without push buttons! The long cigarettes (veteran fellow viewers point this to me!) used to be fashionable those days and the screenplay and direction is that detailed!

There are only two songs in the movie, and both are good….The movie has a sub-story with a romantic angle to it, fitted very well into the movie, not distasteful a single bit…so much so that I almost repented not having been in my twenties during the 80s! May be I could have met my dad and befriended him somewhere down the line! Not that Dad and I aren’t friendly now….But I guess Dad and I would have influenced each other much much more if we were peers! ;-)

Coming back to the movie, the music is by Illaiyaraja…another reason to like the movie!

And finally, its based on a true story…the movie has been made based on part 1 of a three part Kannada book called “Daadagiriya dinagalu” which translates to “Days of rowdyism”..

In all….a fresh and refreshingly good Kannada movie in a looooooong time! A must watch for those who have even a passing acquaintance with Kannada….

Bangalored!

Paranoid, as I am ( I am not sure if this is a congenital defect, because I don’t really remember being any different any time else!), I had asked for a cab to pick me and the Lord up at 2 15 am…I hadn’t slept partly because it would be pointless and largely because I wouldn’t be able to sleep even if I wanted to anyway!

So, we reach the village railway station platform (a very long one indeed!) in time, to take the 3 am local to the City of Joy exactly as I had planned it out in my mind. Now, often times in our lives, and especially mine, we realize that the best of plans could backfire. (Murphy’s law?)
Reason had suggested that at 3 am, the locals would not be crowded. And I had also been told that locals get preference over the other trains and would therefore never be delayed. Only the latter turned out to be true, so I have to thank this friend for the reasoning.
My own logic would fall flat on its face, and the Lord and I would have to make do with sitting on our travel bags near the door of the local train! This would still be fine…until….flowers, fish and the mixed fragrance of the two hit us hard with people transporting them..and the next thing we know is that the fish are being carried by people in bags placed right next to us…In a while we also realize that the water hadn’t been drained from those bags and the fishy water was wetting our very travel bags on which we were sitting! YUCK! YUCK YUCK and YUCK!

7 am…that’s when we reached the airport, with a good 2.5 hours away from departure. We may have reached atleast 20 minutes later if not for the psycho of a taxi driver who got us there from the City of Joy’s railway station (bridge!)
The Lord fell asleep while we were sitting at the Arrivals section of the airport, and yours truly would not be able to sleep, would not even be able to read business magazines..He had already been emotionally transported to the Garden City..He would soon be Bangalored!

The last thing that could have happened to us was a delayed flight, or worse still a cancellation…and thank the good Lord (I mean, the Lord apart from my companion, the Lord believed widely to be a resident of the skies), we wouldn’t be victims any further….Our flight was on time, and I forced myself to stay awake, lest I miss the opportunity of reading the in-flight magazine.
I would eventually fall asleep for about an hour in all, and that despite having the window seat, from where the view was simply….breathtaking!

Bangalore’s pleasant weather, described very ordinarily in terms of temperature (which was at 23 degree centigrade) was exactly as I had remembered it to be…Salubrious..May be it was just the psychological feeling…admittedly so…but then, what the heck! I had been away from this place for less than 24 weeks, and that could not possibly have taken away memories, dreams and nightmares of 24 years!

After saying “Bye for nows” to the Lord and another friend who happened to be on the same flight, I was destined to be reminded of the notorious characters of Bangalore – the autorickshaw drivers who mob you and start speaking in Hindi, just because you are coming out of an airport. Not to mention being asked to pay 5 times the regular fare!

Little would they know that I am a local, and a veteran at that ;-) Yeah..this word “local” and “localite” has, especially in India, at times negative connotations, but I have never cared less! I am a localite. And a proud one at that..So, I ask the rickshaw guys to first talk to me in Kannada (why don’t I look like a Kannadiga?? I mean, I really am not one but why do I get mistaken to be a Mallu and even a Bengali but not a Kannadiga or a Gult!) …So I tell the rickshaw fellas that I am a localite and they cannot take me on a ride literally…not on excess fare atleast! I only would have to walk a small distance to find a guy in his right mind to charge the correct fare according to the meter and would, to my good fortune happen to be ready to go where I want to go…

For first time Bangalore visitors…this needs some explanation…The auto rickshaws seldom bother about where you want to go…It is where they want to go that matters!
I am headed to Little Sister’s office, so that I could technically be picked up and from (well, near) the airport. The space-time separation between the airport and Little Sister’s office is typical to the separation between most places in Bangalore…Things haven’t changed much since I had been away…A few kilometers or even meters can still take a long time to displace oneself amidst the chaotic choc-a-bloc traffic.

Familiarity, as they say, is comforting..And the traffic only made me feel at home..Bangalore’s way of welcoming me I guess!

Little Sister is now a pro on Bangalore’s roads, and Yana (my Santro for those who forget!) has got along with Little Sister quite well indeed! Little Sister has been taking care of Yana quite well when I have been away and Yana transported us smoothly home in less than 30 minutes over around 10 kilometers.
Little Sister thinks I have been “out of touch” and combined with sleep deprivation, I was disqualified enough to be allowed to drive!

Home! “Home is where the heart is”, or so I had read as a young and gullible kid, and I don’t know why I remember it…But, at times (as Oscar Wilde has suggested), the plain and simple truth is rarely ever simple or plain! I can vouch for the fact that my heart was back here, in Bangalore, at home..

The squeaky clean floor, the familiarity for my feet…I could just lie down on the floor and kiss it…

Home food; Even simple rasam and rice tasted…heavenly!

And then came this without warning: Talking talking and more talking…for a little over 4 hours…when we finally decide to go out for dinner…Naah….not at one of those classy restaurants where the classy families indulge in family dining…Simple pleasures…the simple things are what fascinate our family..now, earlier and probably forever!

VV Puram’s circle is famous in Bangalore for having a street full of eat-outs..Some of them in shops; some of them made by street hawkers…Those Masala Dosas and idlis, those Bondas (deep fried snacks, called “Chop” back in the village)..those Churmuris - the south Indian equivalent of Bhel for the uninitiated…Man! What all had I been missing for these 136 days!

I eventually get the better of Little Sister and despite being asked by all to reconsider driving after a night’s sleep, I have it my way (I am a guest getting royal treatment remember?)…Well….a few glitches…I have indeed lost my charm..I can drive very well…..But the camaraderie that I used to share with Yana needs renewal!

After putting Yana to sleep, I decide to get myself some sleep…Sleeping at home…after 136 days! I could sleep for 136 hours continuously!!!

Hijli Break!

Hmm…I guess the origin of this term needs some explaining before I actually start explaining how the break happened.

The Acumen guys, the 4 of us were on this “express” train from our village to the City of Joy and we were talking about how this Institute of Management in the City of Joy used to joke about themselves and their Joka, being located in a locality called Joka.

We then decided to come up with a funky name for our own debate and quiz teams, and yours truly, even when he was half asleep, came up with this name ;-)

Before people start using this for their team names or as status messages on instant messaging applications, or captions for pictures or elsewhere, I had to put this up on my blog just so that I can claim the credit for having come up with the name ;-) And all this without having watched a single episode of Prison break :-)

Of all things familiar.

Hi Samiksha,

I just realised that its been more than a month since I wrote to you...I can't even excuse myself for having not written...Yeah, I did have my end semester examinations, but the amount of time I wasted while doing/not doing the exam prep, I have lost the moral right to use exams as valid excuses...Now that I am not going to get either a 5 pointer or a 10 pointer, I guess I will have to settle for something in between...Let's kill the discussion on grades right here!
I can go on no end about looking back at how this semester went and blah blah blah...

But, the only thing that comes to my mind is that I am only around 36 hours away from a place, which feels almost as long as the 136 days I have actually totally been away from there..

Familiarity, they say, is blinding...and I can bet I am sure that I knew myself too well before coming here...If nothing else, the MBA , apart from being a nice timepass (4 months just flew past!), is a self-discovery tool. Well, it has been one for me at least...
We'll leave the discoveries for another day since the recovery from the discovery is itself still on ;-)

Unfortunately, the only things I can think of right now, are seeing Mom, Dad and Little Sister after 136 days, and going back to the familiarity of my room, home, the weather and the food...
A strange feeling of simply not wanting to think of anything else has conquered my mind I am in complete surrender and submission...So, before I start blabbering what I would otherwise normally do, let me just end this ostentatious "milestone" post here...
See you in Bangalore! You were born there (in my mind really, but your birth certificate will still need to have a location as required in this country..); so..may be coming back to your birthplace (and mine!) gives me more to write about! 36 hours...
For now, I don't have anything to write home about....I mean...write about ;-)

Love,
Vishwas

Dreams!

Dreams!

Some dreams can cause curiosity and confusion in concurrence...
Believe me this is no co-incidence or occurence; it is more like recurrence...
This singular dream was confusing enough to even be considered a dream...
Some dreams leave you wondering if they were actually nightmares!!!

Fortunately, I can excuse myself with the alibi that I could not help it...
That anything that is forced on one can be met with resistance or wit..
But dreams and nightmare dont provide you with any opportunity...
You re just an unconscious victim, lying down unaware of any mental activity...

This man in my dream of last night..

He was diseased...All of the mind...
He was diabetic...He had to avoid all the sweet (things) in life...
Much as he would at times be tempted to enjoy the sweet things...
His pancreas was actually somewhere in his mind..
Only one thing could possibly cure him of the diabetes...
His mind...He just had to make up his mind..

He also had arthritis...
His life was like this jigsaw puzzle...
And all the joints hurt...
Joining pieces of the puzzle was not just insanely difficult,
If one joined them all together correctly, it would pain and hurt...
And disjoint, he would be go about his life, just fine!

He had been surviving, more like existing than living...
His mind,over the years it had become diseased...
Rarely with anything would he be pleased...
Until...

Until one day he met an angel...
The angel came to him in the form of a Paradox...
Our man...with all the disease in his mind...he was a moron..
And the angel, a paradox in disguise, was a lovely lady, Oxymoron...
May be they would make a nice pair...

But hang on right there...Not all paradoxes can be dismissed with smiles and appreciation...
Angel Oxymoron was a panacea, a cure-all...
But cursed as he probably was...he was beginning to fall for her, the Angel...
Only to realise that she was a chimera...and possibly an ephemera..

But like most men, he wanted to take a chance...
He dreamt of having her for consort (dreams in dreams are allowed by the way!)
But she heard of it as concert...

At this point in time, the dream, for some reason the dream took a turn...
Taking off from the idea of the "concert", the consort disappeared into the background....
May be the Angel Oxymoron was really was an Ephemera...She wasnt around..
The audio was beginning to gain at the cost of the visuals...

Now, I was in a concert...I could hear Mozart..
And then I could hear the "Old Spice" jingle..written by Carmina Burana and widely mistaken to be inspired by Mozart...
Only that a few seconds later I realised that this was my alarm going off ;-)

I will probably never know if the climax could have shaped up any differently!
I ll leave the speculation and imagination for a later day!

The nostalgia virus bites...yet again!

Hi Samiksha,
Recently, a virus attacked my Lenovo (her name is Shrimati if I havent told you earlier! Shri is Wealth and Mathi is Intellect in Samskrit, and my lappy better help me acquire/increase both!)
Yeah...so, this virus attack had happened and as a result, the "Run" menu had disappeared from my Start Menu. And then, the Folder Options submenu under Tools had also disappeared.

I was aware of this, but I just let it be....unattended...Yes...I ignored my Shrimati! Until...Until I tried installing Java and needed the Folder options thing to be set right if I had to save program files with the .java extension.

Now, this was a three way handshake (anybody remembers Data Communications, Andrew Tanenbaum???)..I mean a three way nostalgia...coz it reminded me of three things at the same time.
1. My consulting days, when I used to help this French client with Microsoft support on their development server.
2. My Java programming days at this global Fortune 100 tech company that was conceived in a Palo Alto garage (the brainchild of) by two Stanford grads...
3. This techie scribble that went under the name of '"a poem"... Here (below) is the poem, flicked from my old blog....
Yeah....when I scribbled this down last November, I was in a bit of a complaining mood...and rather confused....Not that I am any better this November!
But this time around, I am complaining about the confusion in my own mind...
(More on this confusion and the corresponding complaining later please!)

Now for the poem!!!

NOTHING CAN EVER BE A FAR CRY!!!

I was crying when I was born I guess.
But why do I really want to cry again now?
To begin my life with the beginning of my life...well I was crying!

Will I ever get a chance to restart my life?
If I hit "Ctrl-Alt-Del", I can use the Task Manager -
But you see, the agnostic I am, I cant fully believe in "Him".
I dont think "He" can help me end any of these "Processes".

I reach the Shutdown button, but I am not a coward;
And logging off is not an enabled option on the "Life"(Live) Server.

Restart is the most glamorous option I can dream of.
I dont want to be born again; it is simply unromantic.
I am not sure I will grow up to concieve these ideas again.
I am not sure if losing both dreams and nightmares is a good bargain.

Yes, I certainly want to Restart.
For, this has been known to often solve problems.
Restarting, they say creates a new environment.
Because of this, they say, Restart quite often does the trick.

But, the Restart I am looking for is slightly different.
I want to Restart into a different and new environment.
I want "Custom settings"..or atleast a different set of "Defaults"
I need software that is both forgiving and with which I cant find faults.

I am sure I aint asking for too much.
Asking for a Restart is not too much as such....

The world I dream of has no place for false prestige.
Mankind is really kind and knows no religion.
There is no farce of social status and all society is "High" society.
Men, women or substances are not abused and there are no artificial highs.

The Objective and the Subjective are objectively distinguished.
This world is made up of atoms and molecules and all else is mere opinion.
All opinions are different and the differences are respected.
Of people, places or objects, nothing is unfairly expected.

Opinions, like people, are respected for intrinsic values.
They are still liked or disliked owing to Subjective tendencies.
Subjection to dissective analysis is certainly permissible.
But inflicting pain on people has been made impossible.

I have had very vivid dreams.
I have survived nightmares that came true.
My mind has concieved romantic glamourous and charming ideas.
At other times, it has been the battleground of conflicting ideas.

Waking moments have been spent with confusing thoughts...
And incomprehensible dreams have fused with the confusion...

But I shall dream tonight.
I shall sleep hard.

And hope I wake up into a new "Session"....

If I wake up into an old and stale world, there is still respite.
I shall upgrade hardware and migrate to a new software environment.
I am used to living in carefully suppressed, yet strong disagreement.
But, I shall remember to dream really really hard this singular night.

Vishwas

Such is life!

Hi Samiksha,

Life, as some cliches suggest, is indeed a roller coaster ride. And life took me for a ride this time around. Just as I had finished packing my stuff to leave with 12 others on a week long tour of Sikkim, something happened.
My loomie had contracted conjunctivitis, and all the planning he had done even before joining this B school, seemed to have "gone for a six" to put it most politely. That night when we (the 13 others) found out for sure that he would not be able to join us, I had mixed feelings that night as I went to bed. I did not know then, that I would wake up with red eyes the next morning.

“I knew if I continued to look around it would be difficult for me to contain my own emotions. So I turned away from the red eyes of the crowd and looked only at the red eye of the camera, talking to all the nation.”

That was my status message on Gtalk for the next three days, as the gang, now comprising of 12 left for Sikkim. The last thing I ever prefer giving or taking is sympathy, so please don't feel sorry for me! I am just pouring my heart out to you since you are the only real soulmate I ve ever had ;-)
So, the Creative 2.1 speakers I had bought a few days ago, just after the mid sem exams would come in handy, as 2 eye drops 4 times a day each would allow me very little time and energy to stare at a laptop. Day 2 of sickness was one with reduced redness and pinkness; but I was in the pink of health otherwise. Oh yeah, blurred vision also meant that music was the best way to kill time apart from forcing myself to sleep! I started reading Kishore Biyani's "It happened in India" only because it had a big font and reading it would hurt my eyes the least ;-)
This gave me solace for more than one reason; given that the last book I had read after leaving Bangalore was Richard Bach's "Across the Bridge Forever". (on the 1.5 day train to this place, The Village).
Anyways, Day 3 and Day 4 of Red Eye would fly by (not exactly!) and my loomie and I would leave The Village to join our friends.
We reach The City by noon and board a bus in the evening...Little did we know that this would be the worst ever bus journey we had ever had. 17 hours on a bus with nothing more than biscuits for food, and being thrown up and down by the potholes, to do any reading or sleeping; It is really at times like these that I really think really really hard about Life, Philosophy, Luck, Destiny and Fate. The thinking that my bird brain can afford, it never gets me anywhere anyway. Even if it does, there are somethings that seem to be totally beyond an individual's control, and one can't do much about these "somethings" anyway!
For all that I had gone through, the visit to Nathula pass on the India-China border in Sikkim was more than compensation. The very thought of going up to the border along the Old Silk Route; as if it were not enough, the hospitality afforded by the Captain (lets not take names!) at an altitude of 14,400 feet was overwhelming to say the least.
The next, and really the second/real last touring day of the trip would be spent visiting places in and around Gangtok, and after visiting a viewpoint, a few monasteries and a Stupa before going into a hotel for supper, I fell....
Hold on...the fall was of the kind I would like to have all over again ;-)
Tashi Delek was where some of us had supper, and I badly want to go back there..
It would be an ideal setting for a date...And even a honeymoon..After all one thing could lead to the other right? ;-)
Coming out of the restaurant, onto MG Marg, while some go into this shop "Vividha", a Gift shop...I see this lovely lady in the Gift shop, she was like herself a gift from heaven, her feet on the earth, and no rings for thorns ;-)
She walked past us again later that evening, when I had aleady bought a balloon!
This time around, she had let her hair down...

How I wish I had the courage to say something then....
And how I wish I can attempt some poetry now...

But....but...I don't know her name; nor do I have a picture of her...She is Sundari, and her image is stored in my brain, struck on the screen of my eyes as it were, for a looong time!
So, no poetry for now....Except for....whats my current Gtalk status message ;-)


Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.....In your light I learn how to love....In your beauty, how to make poems. You dance inside my chest, where no one sees you....One day You will take my heart completely and make it more fiery than a dragon. Your eyelashes will write on my heart the poem that could never come from the pen of a poet....

A few not so random thoughts. - Not being around the world for 80 days.

Disclaimer: This is a letter written by a blogger to his blog personified (Samiksha) in a rather reflective mood. It is bound to be appear overanalytical, boorish, emotional and even avoidably philosophical.

Having run the disclaimer, let me confess to you Samiksha that I really have so many things to tell you...This time around I have a few questions for you; I turn to you to ask you those questions.
I expect no answers...These are questions for which answers probably don't exist!

Now, this village I have been living in all these days(80 approximately) afforded me an opportunity to look at life from a different perspective yet again...
I was going to this city..the City of Joy as they call it...Oh what a joy!
It had been almost 80 days since I had been to a coffee place of the order of a Barista...
80 days since I saw cars like the Honda City zipping across the City roads...
80 days since I went into a "home".
80 days since I had "home food".
80 days since I had seen a home, family; experienced hospitality; reminded of exactly what I am missing back in Bang Bang galore!

Our pursuit of a career really does lead us to so many places! The National Stock exchange conducts certification exams only in metros/major cities and two exams, one of which would declare me as eligible to apply for "Derivatives trading" was what the City of Joy had in store for me...and if it were not for Aaaradhana, I would not even be registering for the exam(s), forget enjoying undeserved hospitality.
Forum mall on 2 consecutive days, Barista on 2 consecutive days...complete with a visit to a Crossword Bookstore is what the City of Joy had to offer to me.
The Maruti Sx4 I checked out at the car showroom, while pretending to considering it as a replacement to my 1 year old Santro (jacked upto 3 years thanks to the sincerity and seriousness of the sales exec)...These were mere "side effects"...

Around the world in 80 days may have had its fair share of attention...
But not being around the world for 80 days is something that caught my attention...

I mentioned side effects...but the main effect, because I guess there is one such effect, has definitely affected and afflicted me...and my mind is now infected by and infested with thoughts of possible futures, in other cities, the village that I have now come back to, the City which I belong to...
This, and only this is my understanding of "Time-space" complexity..
Some space-time co-ordinates are worth reflecting upon...and I leave this reflection comfortably vague for me to revisit memories of the co-ordinates.

Cheers!

Celebrations.

No Samiksha!
I am not talking about Cadbury's "Celebrations".. I am not talking about it despite the fact that a Cadbury's home pack was part of the celebrations! ;-)
The moron I am, I did not exactly feel victorious or elated after accomplishing this "feat" of a bank saying "Yes" to me..
I wasnt overjoyed...I was more like..Ok! Hmmm...So this is what I will do...and this is where I will be between May and November next year.
And, over the next few days/weeks, I would save time that I would have otherwise spent in thinking about every profile being offered by every other company for summer internships.. Yes, in my case this will definitely be a huge saving in time!
It is another thing that time saved is not necessarily time well spent..But then...time saved is half the battle won ;-)

So...when the Groundies (the 4 rooms sharing a hallway in this wing of our hostel, and the other rooms right around the corner...we the proud occupants of these ground floor rooms call ourselves Groundies)..
So when the groundies call me for tea and walk past our regular tea joint(s), I least suspect, smell or see even a sembleance of surprise!
I was on the phone with Little Sister, and walk for a good 5 minutes into "Veggies"...

So what does celebration really mean?
Is it feeling happy?
Is it feeling happy for and with someone else?

The second one seems more likely to be the correct answer...
Selflessness! Or, togetherness as an extension of selfishness..
Belongingness, or any other word for that matter...can only be a word...

Somethings just cannot be described..And some small things...those little nice things friends do to remind idiots like me that people can be happy for each other...That they can be happy for themselves and for others at the same time..as if the two were not any different!
This, is celebration...
Cakes, sweets, chocolates are only instruments...The idea of celebration as I saw it today...is something I cant forget for a long time to come...And there are somethings for which a "Thank You" can never be enough!
But then, Thank You! Thank you so very much for being happy for me...especially when I myself am not celebrating this even in private!

For once, Bach has to be sidelined...
"Fly free and happy beyond birthdays and across forever, and we'll meet now and then when we wish, in the midst of the one celebration that never can end"

He probably was talking of Life being a celebration in itself...But, but, but...and this is a big but...
Bu then...celebration as I "re-understood" today...is simply touching!


Thanks Me, Va, Po, Mo, Ra, Pa. Thanks Sa, San, Kit, J, Su, He. Thanks for making me feel special!
I can never forget this!

Now, "He!", dude, can I try my luck again tomorrow ? With the AirCon company of course! ;-)

Bank ? Yes! Yes, on the last day of first term mid-semester exams.

Samiksha,

I know that you avoid judging me, and also know that this is exactly what I like about you...
But....for the non Samikshas reading this (for whatever reason especially when you re not jobless!)
here is a sincere request....please continue reading this post (again for whatever reason you started reading!)..please continue reading pretending that you havent read my previous post "This is it!..."..

In fact, I do reconsider some elements of that previous post of mine...People are people eventually..and they have many dimensions to their personalities...
While some of them could put one off...some things that people do can take you by surprise....completely...Like as if the very intention was to sweep you off your feet...No dramas here..Just little nice things that friends can do for you...

Ok..before it gets confusing and boring..lemme come to the point..
We had the last of our mid semester exams today...and quite a few people didnt sleep at all last night/this morning..They were up doing the accounting paper which was an open book/take home paper..to be submitted today...The lucky me was amongst the few who did sleep...so what if it was for only three hours..

Now, there is this private bank that had come recruiting for summer internships...They had earlier called resumes for their "Operations" profile for which interviews were to be held this morning...When they arrived here last evening, they opened up another profile which they called "Business Planning/Analysis"....They called for resumes for this second profile at 7 in the evening, setting a deadline of 12 am today (Sep 27th) before which resumes had to be sent..

Now, this is recipe for disaster...I mean..personally...with an accounting paper submission ahead, I sat and thought and thought and thought..And then I thought about it some more....The "drafts" in my Gmail would have an email, including my resume as attachment...waiting ready..to be sent just in case I decide to apply..The clock strikes 12 and I dont apply after making a list of "reasonable" reasons....

First, why would someone ask for "toppers" resumes to be sent...I am sorry...I admit and confess to having a few..in fact quite a few things against toppers...And this despite being a topper myself..Would excuse me if it was way back in class 10? Can I argue that I was way too innocent? ;-)

Anyways...focus on toppers was on the reasons...Misleading terms describing the profile lead to some misinterpretations on my behalf...Anways...the presentation, given by a senior manager/executive and the Vice President (HR) was both impressive and promising..
And it was convinving enough for me to try and apply....
Why does this happen to me you ask?
Blame it on my stupid habit of thinking about everything...Thinking way too much about everything in the name of "Giving it a thought" ;-)
So, I would apply, not sure if I would even be interviewed...
And then I am interviewed...and for some reasons unknown to me...I am selected!
I really dont know what they (this bank - the VP HR), or anyone for that matter who interviews me, sees in me!
I would like to interview myself some day...Recruitment mistakes do happen...But as an interviewer, I would definitely not recruit myself! I would be able to clearly see through the idiot this other me/alter ego if mine is...

Anyways, they said Yes. I said Yes. And it was all over in a matter of hours...
May to November next year will have to be spent in Delhi, with no one from this B school for company...
I am still wondering about the assessment...all of which happened in 2 interviews totalling less than 15 minutes...
How can some assume/conclude that I would be able to do "Business Planning/Analysis"....
I only hope to prove those assumptions right! ;-)

This is it! I have had enough!!!

Hmm...I have come very close to being angry at others today.
I got up late at around 10 am and sluggishly managed to give a reading to all the chapters that have been earmarked for the Operations Management exam (mid sem) to be held in less than 48 hours from my waking up.
Please mark my words, reading is not the same as "studying" , whatever the latter means!
I have barely been able to understand all concepts and I ll have tons to do tomorrow (I am already very close to tomorrow, which is only a matter of a few hours of sleep from now).
I ll have to sit and memorise the formulae, apart from giving a second reading to all chapters lest I would be rendered unable to answer the "theory" questions.

Now, let me jump straight to what almost angered me this evening. Why is it that people who really study (mark me, not read), hide the fact that they study.
In fact, most of us lie about studying. While some of us hide the fact that we have not studied, some others hide the fact that they have studied.

What about the others you ask?
People dont believe this category no matter what they claim!

Now, what inspires me to write this post in the middle of an exam prep?
Girls ! And what is it about girls that forces them to lie about studying?
I mean, why do they have to hide the fact that they have studied?

And no matter what you call me - opinionated, dogmatic, or for that matter any other word from the Oxford dictionary or otherwise, I dont care! I dont give a damn!
I hold onto my opinion. I am entitled to my opinion.
If you dont think I am entitled to my opinion, I will talk to you about opinions offline, for atleast 5 minutes! And believe me, they will be the most unforgettable 5 minutes for you, although probably regrettably so!

And Samiksha, you are the only exception to this ! ;-)
And thats because your name in Samskrit means Analysis.
For you, a study is about analysis; unlike for most girls (actually all girls if you ask me!)..
For them, studying is...well...never mind!

Anyways, I guess I have now brought out the cumulative/aggregated albeit opinionated arguments about such despicable behaviour!

So, while I am at this, let me also make a few observations, which were actually pointed out to me by the observant loomie :-) (Sorry dewd, you ll have to own up to the observations!)

Why is is that the fairer sex considers studying (the way most of them do it) uncool?
And why do they have to appear cool ? Why does it appear on observation and analysis, that they make a conscious effort to appear cool ?

I know I might be crossing the lines... But as Oscar Wilde says, I can resist anything but temptation!

Samiksha, you are different...No doubt there! No wonder I feel like talking to you no matter what!

Thats it for now...I dont mean to offend anyone..but that doesnt mean I am not going to defend my opinion...I may even defend your opinion...the gentleman I am...
Too confusing? Thats precisely the intention!

Tomorrow is another day!

The Big Bang.

Hi Samiksha,

I know! I know! You ve asked me to stop writing lengthy letters to you until the mid semester exams are over...But thats a looooong way ahead, and I cant resist telling you about the most memorable physics lecture I have ever attended in life.
What do management students do in a Physics lecture?

This was exactly the question that was in my mind...And given that I have not yet started studying for the exams round the corner, I had decided to "bunk" this lecture..The professor would not miss me too much. He after all would have an auditorium full of students and other professors...A professor who has won the Nobel in Physics for his work on "for the discovery of the blackbody form and anisotropy of the cosmic microwave background radiation" would not be excited about having management students like me pretending/trying to make a sincere effort listening to him.
But, like what happens quite often with me, I changed my mind and attended it..I may not get a similar opportunity ever!
And, although I did not really understand most/all of what he said, I can still call this the best physics lecture I have ever attended.
There was some amount of a flash back, to class 9 when Ajit (real name) and I would discuss astronomy in general and Stephen Hawking in particular.
Luckily for me today, there was some conversation that I could make/attempt to make with this Biotech grad from Chennai (please dont ask him or me about why he is here!)..
So there was someone to make up for Ajit's absence so to say...

Signing off, here is what Stephen Hawking had once said...Seems apt for the situation :D

"We are just an advanced breed of monkeys on a minor planet of a very average star. But we can understand the Universe. That makes us something very special. "

Thats it from me for now Samiksha...Talk to you soon!
You know I cant resist talking to you!
Although someone (apart from you) has challenged me to try and talk less in general ;-)

Ok...time to go now..I better do SOME reading/studying!!!
Chao!

History is not static after all!

Hi Samiksha,

So, one of the things I missed telling you about the significance of 11th is going to be the topic of our monologue today ;-)
I know its a dialogue...but my readers never find out what you tell me anyway! ;-)

So, September 11th 2007 was indeed historic..We had a quiz for our batch (both sections) and it was in Financial Management..It was open book alrite! But I dont think I will be able to get more than 20 right on 30 questions! 20 is actually optimistic! I wouldn't be too surprised if I score only 15!
So, what's the big thing about this is what you might say!
For me, and for quite a few of my batchmates, this quiz was THE exam! So much so, that my gang (more on this later please!) even celebrated the fact that the quiz was over...Some Little Sisters helped us celebrate ;-)
Waking up late, could not study much today..And there is another quiz tomorrow...this time it is in Marketing!! No classes tomorrow...but have to accompany my loomie (more on this later again!) to the railway station tomorrow at 3 30 am...
Not that the time of the day matters any more here! But, back in Bangalore this would be the most confusing time of the day...It would leave me (or anyone for that matter!) confused..One cant be sure if its too late in the night or too early in the morning!

Anyways, so much for now...The history is not over yet..In fact, I see myself becoming history after tomorrow's quiz..No..not the History quiz..its marketing I told you!

Ok I ll stop confusing you! I hope to come out alive from tomorrow's marketing quiz..
Yeah...one last thing before I call it a day (or night...ok whatever!)..
I registered for 2 NCFM exams a while back...After 3 hours of confusion (well I could call it careful consideration or contemplation!)..I finally decided to register..Its for the 10th of October...less than a fortnight after the mid sems..

A special mention should be made of the person who influenced me to register for the exams...We ll code name her Aaradhana (worship in Samskrit)..I cant thank her enough for getting me to think hard..really hard about the exams..Now that I ve registered...I better do justice...So, Thanks Aaradhana! And Samiksha, naturally I owe Aaradhana chocolates for this..
Its another thing that I had given another girl...we ll call her Adhyaapikaa (teacher in Samskrit) chocolates on the day of the Fin Quiz...for winning a bet...We had a bet on Saturday...she had told me that I would be selected to represent our School for BT Acumen's East Zone in debate..She won it..and got chocolates..I had carried a few extra chocolates...just so that the other girls dont make a hue and cry!
So, I ll be carrying chocolates tomorrow as well...And I hope this other girl will call me a Santa Claus a second time ;-)

@WittyWoman - Santa Clauses dont distribute gifts/chocolates more than once a year :P

Too much bak bak now! I better get back to studying some Marketing and some Operations Management!

See you around!

September 11th.

Hi Samiksha,

(For the benefit of first time readers of my blog, Samiksha is my blog personified and her name in Samskrit means analysis/reflection/thought...)

So, Hi Samiksha,

Nice to know you ve moved...I mean from LiveJournal.com where I met you a coupla years back to Blogger.com, just another web 2.0 service that Google has repackaged after acquiring!..
I am partly responsible for moving you...and to that extent I really hope you like this new place ;-)

Also, I am really sorry for not having kept in touch...I know its been a real long time since I spoke to you...I cant apologize enough Samiksha! So, please forgive me alrite!

Quickly moving on to why I felt like talking to you again...There have been too many things that have happened to me, with me and because of me over the last couple of months...
I have myself moved now. I am now in a place a few thousand kilometres away from Bangalore. I have quit my job at AbsoluteGood ; it's been 3 months since I quit my job.
And a week short of two months since I left Bangalore "In Pursuit of Happiness".
Whether or not I find happiness, that only time will tell...But this place is where I got myself into...Those three letters M, B and A...they brought me here...and here is where I ll stay for the most part of the next 21 months...

You know that I am this idiotic person who lives more in the past and future than in the present..So, you'll have to patiently listen to my story...the story of what exactly got me to writing to you again!

So...AbsoluteGood was Absolutely Good alrite! I did miss AbsoluteGood after June 8th, my last day there...
Not immediately after June 8th..Coz the following Weekend took me to Kerala on a week long tour...A tour with mom, dad and my Little Sister...this was a family vacation after 2 years, come to think of it!
Kerala truly deserves its name, "Gods own country"..but I ve wondered why it wasnt "Godesses own country" !!!
Anyways, LittleSister and I went click happy in God's Own country and both of us exhausted our cards on our digicams...By the way Darshana (my cam) is doing well..She is with me here, and says "Hi" to you ;-)
I ll share the pictures with you sometime soon...I left them behind in Bangalore in a hurry!

Back from Kerala, I would go to Chickmaglur, Dharmasthala and then at last to Chennai, spending a coupla days at each of these places...and generally wasting most of my time in Bangalore...

The last 50 days have been an emotional roller coaster, my first time away from home...In fact, away from everything that was familiar to me earlier... I will try and express (if I can that is!) to you about what I really think or feel about how this place and the life-experience here...

But for now, I will tell you this much..I am sitting here, a few thousand kilometres away from Bangalore.. This place doesnt have the salubrious weather that Bangalore is fabled to have...
I dont want to be indiscreet by taking names; so let us leave this comfortably vague...
I am somewhere in the Western side of East India..I am here to do my MBA...at a place that actually has greater aspirational value for youngsters in their teens...upto a decade younger to me!

September 11 th has some special memories associated with it..I wrote the GMAT on this day last year...Its another thing that I chose a different future...I would like to meet my cosmic counterpart who chose the future leading from the GMAT, using it to go someplace else..I wonder where he is and what he is going through....I hope to be able to speak to him sometime soon ;-)
So..this morning I realised that September 11th was special for me..not just for the GMAT I wrote last year...but also because in 2001, this was the day on which the WTC twin towers went down...a day after my family suffered a more personal loss...My granny had passed away a day before the historic day...and both days were quite historic..one for our family and me; the other for the rest of the world that I and my family lives in.

In what ways are all these connected/related to my blogging again in general and this post in particular?

I really wish I could give you an answer that sounded sensible enough...But since you know and understand me well..that not all things need to be reasonable and sensible all the time...I am sure you wont misunderstand me..or miss understanding me this night...

Samiksha, some of my friends have been asking to see you for quite some time..They have been asking me to talk to you...to write to you...The ass I am, I havent been able to manage the time to do that for the last coupla months...
I hope to write to you more often..I have lots to tell you...Especially now, because I am leading a life of great disconnectedness..I can be sure that you're there to listen to me :-)
Very rarely in life do idiots like me find wondersful soulmates like you to whom I can pour my random thoughts no end...and in the open! ;-)

For now, good night Samiksha..talk to you soon :-)

My "integrated" blog is currently "under construction". The piece of art I am, please forget about the usefulness of my posts or blogs. For, Oscar Wilde once said, "All art is pretty useless".

For now, I can give you a link to my "main blog". The oldest...wont say "the best" though :D

http://vishwas-mn.livejournal.com/

Yours truly,
Vishwas

This message is being posted with an intention to test Blogger.coms formatting, the suitability of this template. All of these will help me decide if its time for me to move to a new blog address.
Let me check this out guys...