Hi Samiksha,
Recently, a virus attacked my Lenovo (her name is Shrimati if I havent told you earlier! Shri is Wealth and Mathi is Intellect in Samskrit, and my lappy better help me acquire/increase both!)
Yeah...so, this virus attack had happened and as a result, the "Run" menu had disappeared from my Start Menu. And then, the Folder Options submenu under Tools had also disappeared.
I was aware of this, but I just let it be....unattended...Yes...I ignored my Shrimati! Until...Until I tried installing Java and needed the Folder options thing to be set right if I had to save program files with the .java extension.
Now, this was a three way handshake (anybody remembers Data Communications, Andrew Tanenbaum???)..I mean a three way nostalgia...coz it reminded me of three things at the same time.
1. My consulting days, when I used to help this French client with Microsoft support on their development server.
2. My Java programming days at this global Fortune 100 tech company that was conceived in a Palo Alto garage (the brainchild of) by two Stanford grads...
3. This techie scribble that went under the name of '"a poem"... Here (below) is the poem, flicked from my old blog....
Yeah....when I scribbled this down last November, I was in a bit of a complaining mood...and rather confused....Not that I am any better this November!
But this time around, I am complaining about the confusion in my own mind...
(More on this confusion and the corresponding complaining later please!)
Now for the poem!!!
NOTHING CAN EVER BE A FAR CRY!!!
I was crying when I was born I guess.
But why do I really want to cry again now?
To begin my life with the beginning of my life...well I was crying!
Will I ever get a chance to restart my life?
If I hit "Ctrl-Alt-Del", I can use the Task Manager -
But you see, the agnostic I am, I cant fully believe in "Him".
I dont think "He" can help me end any of these "Processes".
I reach the Shutdown button, but I am not a coward;
And logging off is not an enabled option on the "Life"(Live) Server.
Restart is the most glamorous option I can dream of.
I dont want to be born again; it is simply unromantic.
I am not sure I will grow up to concieve these ideas again.
I am not sure if losing both dreams and nightmares is a good bargain.
Yes, I certainly want to Restart.
For, this has been known to often solve problems.
Restarting, they say creates a new environment.
Because of this, they say, Restart quite often does the trick.
But, the Restart I am looking for is slightly different.
I want to Restart into a different and new environment.
I want "Custom settings"..or atleast a different set of "Defaults"
I need software that is both forgiving and with which I cant find faults.
I am sure I aint asking for too much.
Asking for a Restart is not too much as such....
The world I dream of has no place for false prestige.
Mankind is really kind and knows no religion.
There is no farce of social status and all society is "High" society.
Men, women or substances are not abused and there are no artificial highs.
The Objective and the Subjective are objectively distinguished.
This world is made up of atoms and molecules and all else is mere opinion.
All opinions are different and the differences are respected.
Of people, places or objects, nothing is unfairly expected.
Opinions, like people, are respected for intrinsic values.
They are still liked or disliked owing to Subjective tendencies.
Subjection to dissective analysis is certainly permissible.
But inflicting pain on people has been made impossible.
I have had very vivid dreams.
I have survived nightmares that came true.
My mind has concieved romantic glamourous and charming ideas.
At other times, it has been the battleground of conflicting ideas.
Waking moments have been spent with confusing thoughts...
And incomprehensible dreams have fused with the confusion...
But I shall dream tonight.
I shall sleep hard.
And hope I wake up into a new "Session"....
If I wake up into an old and stale world, there is still respite.
I shall upgrade hardware and migrate to a new software environment.
I am used to living in carefully suppressed, yet strong disagreement.
But, I shall remember to dream really really hard this singular night.
Vishwas
Sunday, October 28, 2007
Tuesday, October 23, 2007
Such is life!
Hi Samiksha,
Life, as some cliches suggest, is indeed a roller coaster ride. And life took me for a ride this time around. Just as I had finished packing my stuff to leave with 12 others on a week long tour of Sikkim, something happened.
My loomie had contracted conjunctivitis, and all the planning he had done even before joining this B school, seemed to have "gone for a six" to put it most politely. That night when we (the 13 others) found out for sure that he would not be able to join us, I had mixed feelings that night as I went to bed. I did not know then, that I would wake up with red eyes the next morning.
“I knew if I continued to look around it would be difficult for me to contain my own emotions. So I turned away from the red eyes of the crowd and looked only at the red eye of the camera, talking to all the nation.”
That was my status message on Gtalk for the next three days, as the gang, now comprising of 12 left for Sikkim. The last thing I ever prefer giving or taking is sympathy, so please don't feel sorry for me! I am just pouring my heart out to you since you are the only real soulmate I ve ever had ;-)
So, the Creative 2.1 speakers I had bought a few days ago, just after the mid sem exams would come in handy, as 2 eye drops 4 times a day each would allow me very little time and energy to stare at a laptop. Day 2 of sickness was one with reduced redness and pinkness; but I was in the pink of health otherwise. Oh yeah, blurred vision also meant that music was the best way to kill time apart from forcing myself to sleep! I started reading Kishore Biyani's "It happened in India" only because it had a big font and reading it would hurt my eyes the least ;-)
This gave me solace for more than one reason; given that the last book I had read after leaving Bangalore was Richard Bach's "Across the Bridge Forever". (on the 1.5 day train to this place, The Village).
Anyways, Day 3 and Day 4 of Red Eye would fly by (not exactly!) and my loomie and I would leave The Village to join our friends.
We reach The City by noon and board a bus in the evening...Little did we know that this would be the worst ever bus journey we had ever had. 17 hours on a bus with nothing more than biscuits for food, and being thrown up and down by the potholes, to do any reading or sleeping; It is really at times like these that I really think really really hard about Life, Philosophy, Luck, Destiny and Fate. The thinking that my bird brain can afford, it never gets me anywhere anyway. Even if it does, there are somethings that seem to be totally beyond an individual's control, and one can't do much about these "somethings" anyway!
For all that I had gone through, the visit to Nathula pass on the India-China border in Sikkim was more than compensation. The very thought of going up to the border along the Old Silk Route; as if it were not enough, the hospitality afforded by the Captain (lets not take names!) at an altitude of 14,400 feet was overwhelming to say the least.
The next, and really the second/real last touring day of the trip would be spent visiting places in and around Gangtok, and after visiting a viewpoint, a few monasteries and a Stupa before going into a hotel for supper, I fell....
Hold on...the fall was of the kind I would like to have all over again ;-)
Tashi Delek was where some of us had supper, and I badly want to go back there..
It would be an ideal setting for a date...And even a honeymoon..After all one thing could lead to the other right? ;-)
Coming out of the restaurant, onto MG Marg, while some go into this shop "Vividha", a Gift shop...I see this lovely lady in the Gift shop, she was like herself a gift from heaven, her feet on the earth, and no rings for thorns ;-)
She walked past us again later that evening, when I had aleady bought a balloon!
This time around, she had let her hair down...
How I wish I had the courage to say something then....
And how I wish I can attempt some poetry now...
But....but...I don't know her name; nor do I have a picture of her...She is Sundari, and her image is stored in my brain, struck on the screen of my eyes as it were, for a looong time!
So, no poetry for now....Except for....whats my current Gtalk status message ;-)
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.....In your light I learn how to love....In your beauty, how to make poems. You dance inside my chest, where no one sees you....One day You will take my heart completely and make it more fiery than a dragon. Your eyelashes will write on my heart the poem that could never come from the pen of a poet....
Life, as some cliches suggest, is indeed a roller coaster ride. And life took me for a ride this time around. Just as I had finished packing my stuff to leave with 12 others on a week long tour of Sikkim, something happened.
My loomie had contracted conjunctivitis, and all the planning he had done even before joining this B school, seemed to have "gone for a six" to put it most politely. That night when we (the 13 others) found out for sure that he would not be able to join us, I had mixed feelings that night as I went to bed. I did not know then, that I would wake up with red eyes the next morning.
“I knew if I continued to look around it would be difficult for me to contain my own emotions. So I turned away from the red eyes of the crowd and looked only at the red eye of the camera, talking to all the nation.”
That was my status message on Gtalk for the next three days, as the gang, now comprising of 12 left for Sikkim. The last thing I ever prefer giving or taking is sympathy, so please don't feel sorry for me! I am just pouring my heart out to you since you are the only real soulmate I ve ever had ;-)
So, the Creative 2.1 speakers I had bought a few days ago, just after the mid sem exams would come in handy, as 2 eye drops 4 times a day each would allow me very little time and energy to stare at a laptop. Day 2 of sickness was one with reduced redness and pinkness; but I was in the pink of health otherwise. Oh yeah, blurred vision also meant that music was the best way to kill time apart from forcing myself to sleep! I started reading Kishore Biyani's "It happened in India" only because it had a big font and reading it would hurt my eyes the least ;-)
This gave me solace for more than one reason; given that the last book I had read after leaving Bangalore was Richard Bach's "Across the Bridge Forever". (on the 1.5 day train to this place, The Village).
Anyways, Day 3 and Day 4 of Red Eye would fly by (not exactly!) and my loomie and I would leave The Village to join our friends.
We reach The City by noon and board a bus in the evening...Little did we know that this would be the worst ever bus journey we had ever had. 17 hours on a bus with nothing more than biscuits for food, and being thrown up and down by the potholes, to do any reading or sleeping; It is really at times like these that I really think really really hard about Life, Philosophy, Luck, Destiny and Fate. The thinking that my bird brain can afford, it never gets me anywhere anyway. Even if it does, there are somethings that seem to be totally beyond an individual's control, and one can't do much about these "somethings" anyway!
For all that I had gone through, the visit to Nathula pass on the India-China border in Sikkim was more than compensation. The very thought of going up to the border along the Old Silk Route; as if it were not enough, the hospitality afforded by the Captain (lets not take names!) at an altitude of 14,400 feet was overwhelming to say the least.
The next, and really the second/real last touring day of the trip would be spent visiting places in and around Gangtok, and after visiting a viewpoint, a few monasteries and a Stupa before going into a hotel for supper, I fell....
Hold on...the fall was of the kind I would like to have all over again ;-)
Tashi Delek was where some of us had supper, and I badly want to go back there..
It would be an ideal setting for a date...And even a honeymoon..After all one thing could lead to the other right? ;-)
Coming out of the restaurant, onto MG Marg, while some go into this shop "Vividha", a Gift shop...I see this lovely lady in the Gift shop, she was like herself a gift from heaven, her feet on the earth, and no rings for thorns ;-)
She walked past us again later that evening, when I had aleady bought a balloon!
This time around, she had let her hair down...
How I wish I had the courage to say something then....
And how I wish I can attempt some poetry now...
But....but...I don't know her name; nor do I have a picture of her...She is Sundari, and her image is stored in my brain, struck on the screen of my eyes as it were, for a looong time!
So, no poetry for now....Except for....whats my current Gtalk status message ;-)
Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing, there is a field. I will meet you there.....In your light I learn how to love....In your beauty, how to make poems. You dance inside my chest, where no one sees you....One day You will take my heart completely and make it more fiery than a dragon. Your eyelashes will write on my heart the poem that could never come from the pen of a poet....
Thursday, October 11, 2007
A few not so random thoughts. - Not being around the world for 80 days.
Disclaimer: This is a letter written by a blogger to his blog personified (Samiksha) in a rather reflective mood. It is bound to be appear overanalytical, boorish, emotional and even avoidably philosophical.
Having run the disclaimer, let me confess to you Samiksha that I really have so many things to tell you...This time around I have a few questions for you; I turn to you to ask you those questions.
I expect no answers...These are questions for which answers probably don't exist!
Now, this village I have been living in all these days(80 approximately) afforded me an opportunity to look at life from a different perspective yet again...
I was going to this city..the City of Joy as they call it...Oh what a joy!
It had been almost 80 days since I had been to a coffee place of the order of a Barista...
80 days since I saw cars like the Honda City zipping across the City roads...
80 days since I went into a "home".
80 days since I had "home food".
80 days since I had seen a home, family; experienced hospitality; reminded of exactly what I am missing back in Bang Bang galore!
Our pursuit of a career really does lead us to so many places! The National Stock exchange conducts certification exams only in metros/major cities and two exams, one of which would declare me as eligible to apply for "Derivatives trading" was what the City of Joy had in store for me...and if it were not for Aaaradhana, I would not even be registering for the exam(s), forget enjoying undeserved hospitality.
Forum mall on 2 consecutive days, Barista on 2 consecutive days...complete with a visit to a Crossword Bookstore is what the City of Joy had to offer to me.
The Maruti Sx4 I checked out at the car showroom, while pretending to considering it as a replacement to my 1 year old Santro (jacked upto 3 years thanks to the sincerity and seriousness of the sales exec)...These were mere "side effects"...
Around the world in 80 days may have had its fair share of attention...
But not being around the world for 80 days is something that caught my attention...
I mentioned side effects...but the main effect, because I guess there is one such effect, has definitely affected and afflicted me...and my mind is now infected by and infested with thoughts of possible futures, in other cities, the village that I have now come back to, the City which I belong to...
This, and only this is my understanding of "Time-space" complexity..
Some space-time co-ordinates are worth reflecting upon...and I leave this reflection comfortably vague for me to revisit memories of the co-ordinates.
Cheers!
Having run the disclaimer, let me confess to you Samiksha that I really have so many things to tell you...This time around I have a few questions for you; I turn to you to ask you those questions.
I expect no answers...These are questions for which answers probably don't exist!
Now, this village I have been living in all these days(80 approximately) afforded me an opportunity to look at life from a different perspective yet again...
I was going to this city..the City of Joy as they call it...Oh what a joy!
It had been almost 80 days since I had been to a coffee place of the order of a Barista...
80 days since I saw cars like the Honda City zipping across the City roads...
80 days since I went into a "home".
80 days since I had "home food".
80 days since I had seen a home, family; experienced hospitality; reminded of exactly what I am missing back in Bang Bang galore!
Our pursuit of a career really does lead us to so many places! The National Stock exchange conducts certification exams only in metros/major cities and two exams, one of which would declare me as eligible to apply for "Derivatives trading" was what the City of Joy had in store for me...and if it were not for Aaaradhana, I would not even be registering for the exam(s), forget enjoying undeserved hospitality.
Forum mall on 2 consecutive days, Barista on 2 consecutive days...complete with a visit to a Crossword Bookstore is what the City of Joy had to offer to me.
The Maruti Sx4 I checked out at the car showroom, while pretending to considering it as a replacement to my 1 year old Santro (jacked upto 3 years thanks to the sincerity and seriousness of the sales exec)...These were mere "side effects"...
Around the world in 80 days may have had its fair share of attention...
But not being around the world for 80 days is something that caught my attention...
I mentioned side effects...but the main effect, because I guess there is one such effect, has definitely affected and afflicted me...and my mind is now infected by and infested with thoughts of possible futures, in other cities, the village that I have now come back to, the City which I belong to...
This, and only this is my understanding of "Time-space" complexity..
Some space-time co-ordinates are worth reflecting upon...and I leave this reflection comfortably vague for me to revisit memories of the co-ordinates.
Cheers!
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
