Nemesis.

That summer morning when he woke up, he wanted to unremember.

He wanted to unremember the Dream that had turned nightmare.

A nightmare that surpassed dawn and clouded him until the morning sun shone.

He realised that he had met his Nemesis.

The date on his watch read " 30 THU ". The time had come.

An invalid date could not have signaled a more valid message.

Running would not be enough. That very morning, he would have to run away.

He had always banked on Einstein's quote about Reality being a function of time.

The Reality however, as he Realised that morning, was that it was time.

Time for him to set himself up for a pilgrimage.

Seek answers to questions that had been making his head spin in several multiples of 360 degrees over the past days that had spilled into a few weeks and then a couple of months.

The innocent fella he was, he was not going to leave any debts behind for me to repay. As in, no monetary debts

But what an arrogant fella I tell ya, he was talking about Indebtedness; about how his life resembled an unbalanced sheet now, reflecting the bordering mental and sentimental imbalance he thought he was going through.

Sometimes, he takes things into his head. That egg shaped head I too inherited from him.

Whoever told him that Life was Fair!

Anyways, before your head starts spinning, let me declutter things up.

Breathe easy. Breathe in slowly. Breathe out quickly.

Now that you are ready, let me break this piece of news to you.

Vishwas Mysore has met with his Nemesis. He has chosen to leave all of us. He has run away. Away from all that was troubling him.

Who am I then, you may ask.

I am his alter ego.

I know all his dark and bright secrets. Well, almost all.

He has left somethings behind for me to deal with. Like for example, his job. And the pay that comes with it. Luckily, he didnt owe any money to anyone. But then, his assets are apparently mine only so long as I don't try to sell them off. Smart fucker. Super-power of attorney it seems! Superior joke. Only that the joke is on me. His Alter Ego. Whatay fucker! He apparently reserves the right to claim just in case he feels like returning into our midst. Irresponsible fella ! He has run away from problems and wants to come back if he feels like. Especially if all problems have been solved. And if he can be assured that there shall be no more problems.

That last bit about wanting to have no problems.

Like it's gonna happen. Jackass! For all his self-proclaimed knowledge and useless education. Anyways.I am his alter ego. So, I cant belittle him beyond a point.

But he was a nice fella in his own way. Well meaning and well intentioned. I only wish him well. I'm not too sure if I'm gonna miss him. Not any more than he's gonna miss me.

His parting words to me were on the lines of Him wanting to put his mind over matter.

I felt like throwing some batter on him. That could have cured him of his mental ailment.

Mind over batter would have baked some nice biscuits to munch on. Given the heat inside his already half-baked mind.

There I go again. I apologise. I mean no disrespect. But then, I have now taken over.

He and I are a lot similar. Yet so different. I dont have any emotional baggage though.

It is now my turn. Huhuhaahah (Roars of laughter).

--Seizonsha aka Sthiramathi (that naive guy - Vishwas Mysore's alter-ego)

Of Hopes, Dreams and Desires.

As I set sail on yet another journey on the days after tomorrow,

A few more wonderful moments I wish I could borrow.

Whom from you may ask, dear Friend. Don't you very well know?

For although every long journey away from home is bitter-sweet,

Every such moment hurts when eyes and minds don't meet.

The direction of the wind is in which I set sail.

For how does it matter when it is that Deam I trail.

The sea-breeze and its occasional sweet whisper,

Makes those Dreams and Desires a tad bit crisper.

The sea waves rushing away and returning,

Like they were signalling in a way, something.

The waters and their persistence,

Against life's harms, helping build resistance;

The serenity of the Sea at night.

Reminding you of Destiny's might.

The perils of the sea for which I mentally prepare,

The effects of the defects which I attempt to repair.

The optimist in me does not like to imagine despair.

I feel like the stoic sailor; a master of sea-fare.

I feel like a captain of a regiment trained in war-fare.

Setting sail, hopeful of a home-coming filled with fan-fare.

Looking forward to coming back to something really really nice.

For home, family and friends give me a feeling unbeatable by Paradise.

- OptiMystic Seizonsha.

Of minds and workshops.

Samiksha,

I has been a month since I have been at home. And although it has been rather hectic on the work front, what with late hours, work creeping into after and before office and weekends. But, no, this is no crib.

Guess this has been quite a cure. When the mind has enough to occupy itself, stray / unwelcome / unpleasant thoughts don't bother loitering around.

And although I have not been running as much as I would like to, I am happy I have rediscovered the reading habit.

Come to think of it, over the last 1 month, despite the hectic work schedule, I feel proud to have gone back to my earlier levels of time and mind management. The sheer variety of activities / breakways has been - well, satisfying yet encouraging. Guess it will only get better when I come back home in April for long.

So, here's what I have been upto just to keep my mind continuously occupied.

2 exams (hope I clear both!)

1 music concert

2 books - each as un-put-downable as the other but (and no offense here Sidin!), liked the Kannada one more than English!

8 movies - yes, all on the big screen with a good mix across language, genre and company dimensions. Sherlock Holmes was no doubt the best!

All the comforting and feel-good moments can never be counted!

Guess (and touchwood!) it has been a great start for 2012.

Hope to read (minds as much as books) and run (races as much as rat-races) much more through the year!

So long,

Keep running!

P.S: The movies will happen even without elaborate planning!

To Run or Run away is - not the question. On False-starts, Head-starts, Perfect and not-so-perfect starts.

Often times in life, one encounters false-starts.

Just when one thinks something has begun, one realises that he has jumped the gun.

That the Head-start was only in his own delusion-afflicted head subjected to Illusion.

Not that all good starts are false-starts.

Nor is it the case that most head-starts are false or imagined.

The fact of the matter, if you really do ponder - is that we fail to imagine head-starts and false-starts almost equally well.

Well, false-starts end up making us look stupid. Or nervous.

But then, that hardly is enough reason to stop thinking about possible head-starts.

For Life, my dear (diary) Samiksha, is sometimes (in fact quite often!) a race.

Possible futures, possible head-starts.

I promise, I shall never give up to be fondly, in fact almost apologetically romantically fantasize about them.

If I were to be shaken into being practical ; be forced to avoid false-starts, I would still say that we need to make a start.

Make a start somewhere.

Aim for that head-start.

If it is worth it, pledge his heart.

Till Death does the Pursuit and him apart.

For until one makes a beginning,

Life shall have no real meaning.

- Seizonsha

P.S: - A part of this was a result of a half-thought crystallised during the 10km run this Sunday on Sankranthi.

The other half - the idea of the "False-Start" was spawned by the not too recent false-start that yours truly was reminded of just as he was beginning to forget it.

He shall promptly and fondly go back to remembering the possible futures now.

After all, the Sthiramathi is supposed to weigh memorably imaginable futures and forgettable pasts alike.

Waiting to meet you. Waiting for you; waiting for myself. (2012)

A few disappointments; yet many other memorable, cherishable appointments.
Uncomfortably forgettable, yet several other unforgettably comfortable moments.
Good times, bad times, horrible times, bland times, in-times, out-times.

Moments of silence. Moments of extreme patience, perseverance for deliverance. Resilience.
10km sprints. Running. Chasing. And some running away. As if to save my life.
Running into. People, ideas, places. Running into myself. Rediscovering life.

Thank you for all the lessons taught, dear 2011.
Some sweet; some others learnt the hard way.
No hard feelings though. Guess, you could'nt help but teach.
Goodbye to you pal. I'm gonna miss the good times we shared.
Especially for all the moments when you showed that you really cared.

On many an ocassion this year, you seemed like a dead end.
Dead ends are forgettable nightmares forgotten when awakened.
Thank God Almighty for the strength to walk past, move ahead, unhurt, unhurting.
Dead ends are what we move beyond, move on from, unfazed; Thoughtful, yetunblinking.


Let's put the past behind us though, mate.
Right now, for the promise of 2012, I cant wait!
She's gonna be my fantasy. My year. My time.
My moment. The turning point. Am sure she'll turn out well !


It has been a while. I have been waiting to meet you.
Waiting to meet myself. Waiting to be myself. With you.

-Seizonsha

P.S Made a few important corrections to the earlier spontaneous rote I wrote.
A few grammatical ; some others tactical yet somewhat practical.

Dead ends are forgettable nightmares forgotten when awakened.

Sthiramathi.

The 12th chapter of the Bhagavat Gita again.
"Again" is probably some kind of a "for-the-want-of-a-better-word" kinda word.
Because, the concept of the Sthiramathi, probably, never left me.
In the true spirit of the word, it should not leave one; the Sthiramathi holds onto the spirit of the word and the entire Bhaktiyoga (the 12th chapter of the Bhagavat Gita is called the Bhaktiyoga).

Now that I have reached a stage where I can rightly presume that I have treated ups and downs, good and bad alike and have been stoic in spirit, unshaken when shook and unmoved despite circumstances tempting my mind to be carried away, I shall return to my business of life.
A business I have been running ever since my adolescence, and presumably reasonably well !

Bitterness is easy and probably natural when one is faced with situations undesirable and seemingly unfavourable. The trick then, is to withhold it, analyse its correctness and watch oneself respond responsibly to it.

Near and dear ones - Family and friends form a fortunate cushion that help you absorb the hard things in life without getting hurt much.

This post is to thank my family and friends for being with me.
This post is to thank God Almightly to have watched over me.
Alright, I am supposed to be an agnostic. But then, Faith, is as important as food at times.
So, thank you all, for being around.

And wish me luck for the rest of our times together.
I promise to strive to keep you happy, just the way I always have.
I promise to be the good boy I have always been.

Weekends over weak ends - Orissa getaways - Chandipur, Devkund via Shimlipal.

Recovering from a bug bite (the travel bug of course!) is often something that involves sound sleep. Some sounds affect that elusive sound sleep, but then, recent delusion and disillusion(ment) meant that elusion - of sleep or anything else will just have to be put up with.

Mohalla tripped to Chandipur via Balasore and then went to Shimlipal/Devkund before returning to Hijli.

Day 1

Balasore is where you train to for about 2.5 hours from Hijli and then you hit the road to Chandipur, about 16 kilometres away. Mahindra Autos and SUVs - take your pick/pic depending on wallet and group sizes.

The ride from Balasore to Chandipur is somewhat like that Roadrash road - countryside. And look up Roadrash if you never once played it when you should have...

Aah...That Balasore is actually a degradation of Baleshwar is what you will realise when you get outta the Balasore/Baleshwar railway station...

We missed the sunset at the Chandipur beach, but walked for a total of about 1.5 hours (to and fro) in the dark, wanting to see the water that weirdly recedes 5 kilometres every now and then...Orissa tourism says that Chandipur is that beach where the visitors wait for the waters instead of the other way round..

The moon (crescent) and Venus looked good during the walk, letting one think or dream of anyone else in another part of the world, near or far, distance and otherwise, who could potentially be looking at it at the same time and plausibly remembering or forgetting you.

Food at Shubham Hotel's Swagath restaurant was good, and while yours truly appreciated the Paneer Capsicum and the Egg pudding, others of the Mohalla fedback about the Pomfrets and prawns. The feedback was that the latter dishes were "amazing!!" !!

Day 2

The drive from Chandipur to Balasore is best undertaken in a commercial vehicle like a Jeep or an SUV and we did accordingly.
We didn't really spot tigers at the Shimlipal Tiger reserve. May be that was because we really only wanted to get to this place called Devakunda and Shimlipal was the means.
Not wanting to get into the debate of what amongst {ends, means} is superior morally or otherwise, let me move on to Devakunda that was certainly our means to enjoyment. "Getaway" is the one word that captures the feeling, personally. Trek up the hill, stop points with a temple thrown in. And water of course! We got to see water at three outta the five points there are..
Whatta trek! And what an "Escape" from all kinda thoughts that one gets and originates...Philosophy definitely has its origins in the hills. Things become as crystal clear as the water that flows down the hills. Even a pseudo-thinker and pseudo-psychological ( I always thought I was only being an amateur and original, building up on what I had learnt through reading and listening...but then, no one wants to be pseudo-anything, so, I should just get over this taunt anyway!)


Hope the prayers at the temple work. Injuries of all kinds seem to be happening in spite of prayers to all kinds of Gods.
Even the Nimishamba temple near Mysore has ignored similar prayers.
And idiots like me always get away lucky to enjoy everything. Pressures, elementary or alimentary don't really come in the way of the "enjoyment".
"Escape" if I can insist.

Looking forward to Hijli Break. For reasons of feeling good and bad. Good about the past and the possible future. Bad because of the lost future and the present which will soon be lost...
88 days...at once seems too few and too many...